feast on THAT.

you know when any kind of spare time isn't really spare time and it's really actually meant to be filled with homework and such things?!

chicken. team chicken. finally. a year and a week later.

i miss close friendships.

but there's some kind of beauty in distance.

smoke alarm.

close the doors!

open the window!

This blog is about aLie. And chicken. Because she said so.

I wasn't expecting the email. I can't reply yet.

I need to think.

But not focus on.

So I think I'll just wait.

Every day i just think that the more i know God the more I need God and I'm finding it hard to not purposely include Him.

Also

Eating.

I'm rubbish at this stupid cleanse.

I think it's only stupid cause I can't do it.

ha.

I wish we lived closer.

my heart aches sometimes.

but at the same time, such joy!

wack.

ok. time to eat the feast.

thankyou alie and kat bing and sorrelina

for being in my life.

and reading over my shoulder =P

and eating crisps that are spicy.

let the good times roll.

shocking.

Yes it's true... This is me updating my blog.
woah.

I'm not entirely sure where to start!
I'm laying in bed in my new room... I moved out of home on thursday and am now living with a family from church.
They're great!
I'm excited to go home for a sunday roast tomorrow though!
I hope my brother and sister will be there too!

Bible school is amazing... although we just had a week off and it's felt like a year!
I'm excited for monday.
Trusting for my financial miracle to come before then!

Life is so wacky right now. I'm literally living on a wing and a prayer... Needing God more than ever. Maybe not though... maybe i'm just realising my need for Him more than ever...
Learning to need Him before people too...
Sometimes i can't tell if I'm just keeping people at an arm's length though... if I'm TRYING to stand in faith and In Christ Alone... if I'm genuinely at peace
or
am I actually not facing realities? Am I keeping a "professional distance" from people to try to protect myself and not be seen as vulnerable... or stupid....?!

All I know is I crave God more and more.
I crave freedom.
but sometimes it's almost like I shy away from it all...

Life, for this past month, has been more busy than I've ever known it... and I am only surviving by the grace of God!
But these past couple of days it's been so so so hard not rushing around!
I thought I was desperate for a break... but now I find that I don't actually know how to deal with one!
I should have done homework today... Lots of homework...
I wanted to make lots of excuses about why I didn't...
But I won't go into it! I'll spare the details lol!
I will just have to do a couple of late nights/early mornings...

Trust Steadily.
Hope Unswervingly.
Love Extravagantly.

I am a human being. Not a human doing.

Today, I miss my friends.

to do list 1

First week over...
wow.
What an intense week!
It's draining just being there... but in the most amazing way!
class is the most random bunch of people EVER!
i think there's 14 of us...
and it just kind of works.
I need to give George his hat back.
I have so much to do today...
Homework (haha! Tasha doing homework... oh how times have changed...!)
Learning 3 songs by monday (I'm going up to Bradford to sing at Mercy Ministries...)
laundry... (It's got to THAT point..you know the point where you can't escape the need any more?!)
Birthday party tonight (family friend's 50th...)
Then tomorrow kids church at 9:30...
straight up to London...
leaving for Bradford at 5:30am
and hopefully not home too late
cause I'm tired just thinking about it!

I think it's hysterical that I crave school. I don't want to miss monday... so funny to me!
I need to figure out how to prioritise stuff though. I've never really been good at consistantly doing that.
Also, I'm discovering more and more how I need God. All the time. I am becoming so sensitive at feeling the difference of when im in His presence and when I'm not.

i need to go pick my sister up... She slept over at her friend's house last night...
Tish moves to London on tuesday =(
I shall miss her immensely!
My baby sister... all growing up.
Funny how that happens...

goodnight first day

first day of school over.
kind of overwhelming.
really.
God is good.
And maybe a job?!
epic.
so so so tired.
bed time.
working laptop.
rain storm.
need books.
craving school.
supper nanny.
smashed irish glass.
breaking habits.
goodnight

the appointed time

"I'll save it for the appointed time..."
and boy was there an appointed time!
and so thankyou for your wise and timely words...
i don't know if you'll ever know... i don't know if I'LL ever know... the full impact of what just happened last night...
God is good =)
i love when he sends friends... real friends... and you can just tell that it's for a bigger reason than just being friends.
so.
this is it.
this is part of me taking steps towards freedom...
this is me cutting off some things that i didn't even fully realise (or want to realise) were holding me back...
God is all that matters...
and if it takes me cutting off things, cutting OUT things...
then that's just how it's got to be.
So.
New blog.
New season.
New Tash.

Bam!